— Ryan Beltram, EDN
If you’ve read my columns before then you know I love stupid criminals. People who commit crimes in general are stupid, but there’s a certain art form to being a stupid criminal. It’s almost impossible to pull off the perfect crime and it’s only a matter of time before the bad guys are caught.
But in order to have the possibility of committing a crime and getting away with it, there’s one rule: Don’t tell anyone. Apparently for one Washington man, not only did he feel the need to tell people, he decided to share it with everyone on the internet.
26-year-old Travis A. Nicolaysen has been convicted of five felonies, including domestic violence, burglary and theft of a firearm. He is wanted by the Washington state Department of Corrections for failing to check in with his community corrections officer since January.
Since being on the run, Nicolaysen has been communicating with friends via Facebook. Friends have urged him to turn himself in. “You’re not getting any younger and you’re looking at a lot of time,” wrote one friend.
Besides eluding police, Nicolaysen has found time to change his relationship status to single following accusations that he assaulted his girlfriend last month. The police are checking his account daily just in case he leaves a clue to his whereabouts.
Guess what. He’s going to slip up. I would love to get into a time machine, travel back to the 1950s and show police officers Facebook. It would blow their minds.
“Criminals boast about getting away from the authorities? Now we know every person who knows Nicolaysen? This should be a lot easier than tracking down all known associates. It’s only a matter of time before he ends up staying with one of his Facebook friends and gives away his location.” That’s what they would say.
As Forrest Gump once said, “stupid is as stupid does.” I give this guy a week before he’s caught. The press will call him the Facebook Bandit or something. No doubt he’ll enjoy the publicity and instead of rehabilitating himself in jail, he’ll think about his next post on Facebook.
Titanic is Rereleased in 3D
Sunday marks the 100 year anniversary of the night Titanic sank. 2, 223 people were aboard the ship when it left Southampton, UK for New York City and only 710 survived after it sank to the bottom of the Atlantic.
To coincide with the anniversary, Titanic was rereleased in 3D two weeks ago. Following the success of his last film, Avatar, director James Cameron decided to convert his other blockbuster into 3D. FIlms shot in 2D and then converted into 3D have not been well received since Avatar rejuvenated the 3D fad.
Films like Clash of the Titans and Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides were two notorious examples of films that looked terrible following a post conversion. But with Cameron spending $18 million and taking a couple of years, Titanic was supposed to be the film that proved that with time and money, a 2D film could look great in 3D.
Well after seeing it in the IMAX theater at Valley River Center, I would give the conversion a rating of “It was alright.” I ended up being more impressed with the IMAX experience than the 3D. The size of the screen and the sound were tremendous and the picture looked crystal clear for a film 15 years old. But the 3D aspects didn’t really do it for me.
The only standout moments I can think of are when the water comes rushing at you down a narrow hallway and doors explode off their hinges. The other is when Jack and Rose are looking down as the ship becomes vertical as it begins to sink. Because the third act takes place at night during the sinking, the 3D effect detracted from the clear picture. 3D has been known to dim the picture of films and in the case of Titanic, this was apparent.
But I’m still recommending you see it because of the IMAX experience. While the film isn’t perfect, it’s still one of the great ‘Epics’ of our time and should be seen on the big screen if you missed it when it first came out. It also might be the fastest three-hour movie ever so don’t worry about having to sit in a theater wearing glasses for that long. The only thing bothering you after three hours will be the marks the glasses leave on your face.
Netflix Instant Pick: Tiny Furniture
On Sunday HBO will debut its new series Girls. Created, directed, written and starring Lena Dunham, the new series follows a group of twentysomethings as they struggle with their post-graduate lives. The show has been getting a lot of buzz in anticipation of its debut, but it wouldn’t exist had Dunham’s feature film Tiny Furniture not been an indie darling.
Released in 2010, Tiny Furniture follows Aura (Dunham) as she returns to her mom’s home in New York City after graduating. With no job prospects to speak of, Aura decides to crash with her mom and younger sister until she figures things out. While staying there, she sees some old friends, gets a job as a restaurant hostess and shelters a guy she has a crush on.
Featuring a cast of unknowns, the film’s strengths are in its writing. After arriving at a party, Aura responds to an old friend’s compliment of her looks by saying, “Are you serious. I feel like this outfit just screams, I’ve been living in Ohio for four years take me back to your gross apartment and have sex with me.”
Another strength of the film is its realistic depiction of Generation Y. These are characters who are intelligent and witty, but without specific skills or motivation to start the next chapter in their lives. Aura is the embodiment of this type of person. She’s depressed, uninspired and stuck. The film’s realistic portrayal of young people is a refreshing concept. This isn’t Gossip Girl or Sex and the City where everyone is beautiful looking. These feel like real people trying to work out their issues.
I wouldn’t recommend the film to everyone. There isn’t much of a plot and the drab, melancholy tone as well as the unflattering portrayal of the main characters may turn some off, but I admired it for its honesty. Refreshingly original, fans of Woody Allen, Wes Anderson and Noah Baumbach should find it familiarly satisfying.