Season’s Greetings…sort of.

I want to share my wonderful Thanksgiving experience with you in hopes that it will lighten your mood for the day and pass along a feeling of cheer and memories of the holidays.  Oh, and a little humor.


It started out so beautifully.  I actually decided to hide the Pot and my new Bong (Water Pipe…lol whatever!!!!!) for a couple of days because there were going to be teens at my house.  I know it’s legal, I just can’t get past the fact that I still have a responsibility to be a good influence.

So…. I took a couple of hits before everyone showed up on Thanksgiving Eve.  I was useless.  I have figured out that I am incapable of anything when high.  I can’t work, cook, sing, read or focus on anything but the fun I am having when I am baked out of my Gourd Hole (my head for those of you who do not know).  It was ok because I had already prepared the house for guests and had done all of the shopping.  Only thing left to do….Try to not appear as stoned as I was.  FYI-Green Crack was the flavor of the day. So my PIC (partner in crime and love of my life) made dinner and saved us all.  I was silly and laughing the entire time.  My grown kids think I am an idiot of course (what else is new?).  All in all it was totally worth it.  In the past when there is an event, I end up working and cleaning and being a good hostess the entire time (resulting in me not relaxing at all).  I did none of that I enjoyed it thoroughly.

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My daughter took some lovely photos!

Thanksgiving Day:  My PIC told me I was not allowed to smoke weed today.  Too much to get done and he was not going to do it alone.  “Ok honey”, I said.  So we proceeded to prepare a wonderful meal for 12.  We had a sit down meal (usually its buffet style in my family).  I wanted it to be beautiful and special for all.  I even planned to go around the room and have each person say what they were grateful for.  This always blows up in my face.  There is always a dumb ass, a smart ass an overachiever and take it all too seriously in the group.  Why do I bother I say?  Well we all ended up laughing and it was great.  The food was awesome and a good time was had by all.  Everyone left around 5 and the house was once again ours.  What a wonderful celebration!!!

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That is some pretty glass!

Immediately I go to get the Bong.  The pot is nowhere to be found.  We turn the house upside down and finally have to admit that someone has stolen my weed.  Shit!  Nothing ruins a great celebration more than thievery.  So we spent the next few days trying to figure it out to no avail.  So, after heated accusations directed at the only likely culprits (the teens), and some pretty upset family members, I find the bag of weed under my bed.  What!!!???!!! How in the hell did it get there?  I didn’t put it there. I inspect it and it appears a couple things are missing but most of it is as I left it just not where I left it.  I am not actually mad at this point.  I am extremely perplexed and embarrassed and still do not know what happened.  Am I developing a split personality?  Was I so out of it that I moved my own cheese and am not aware of it?  Or was it one of my new alter ego’s Sabrina (the party girl) or Endora (the crazy bitch) sabotaging me.

This is what I learned.

  1. Hide your stuff better and tell your PIC where you hid your pot so you don’t end up hiding it from yourself.
  2. Do not ever trust teenagers to do the right thing or fess up (their wiring goes all wonky at 15)
  3. When all else fails tell said teenager that you believe them, let Karma step in (you are better off saying you are sorry for accusing them, forgiving them, pulling them close and inviting them back) I promise this isn’t crazy talk.
  4. Let it go… it doesn’t matter in the big picture.

Since this was my very first experience with Pot around Thanksgiving I have to say I am pretty satisfied.  I have a wonderful, normal dysfunctional family and I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world.  I can’t wait to see what the rest of the holiday season has in store for me.

Happy Holidays and Much Love to you and your dysfunctional, yet perfect Families…

— WJ